Be a caregiver...it'll kill you!

Here's a career slogan for you, "Be a caregiver...it will kill you!" And the funny thing is, that's a GOOD thing!

Let me explain. When I signed up to marry my wonderful wife, I signed up for in sickness and in health. Easy words to pray. Now after two heinous pregnancies and a bout with cancer, I have found myself being a caregiver in ways I really never anticipated for long stretches at a time.

Debbie never thought of herself as needing care. She has always been strong, independent and healthy. I love her for these qualities. But then illness happens. And helplessness happens. And dependency happens.

And for the spouse? Your life goes on hold. So do your dreams and your plans for a day's tasks and the ability to get the same kind of care reciprocated back to you in any equitable quantity.

If you are a caregiver or a single parent or any form of person whom other people rely on during the day and night, you have my prayers. It's a hard job.

And if you do this in your own strength and your own love you will fail. Miserably. And your "caregivee" will know it.

The only way to be able to care for someone well is to die. You must die to yourself and be renewed again unto God. If not, you will never be able to give that one more back rub that's so desperately needed and deserved by your loved one. You won't be able to get back out of bed at 1 am to get the Tylenol. You won't be able to take care of the children one more time while your quiet prayer time is shattered by an early rising 8 year old.

Not that any of these things happen to me...or even to you. I'm just saying... :-)

So ask God for His heart and His plans for you today as a caregiver. Mat 6:33 NKJV - ...seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.

Trust God to remember that you have needs and plans as well. He may just say to you that your single job today is to love your spouse well while you pour into them. Jhn 15:13 NKJV - Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one's life for his friends.

So how do I have the strength to one more time answer my beloved Debbie's call for assistance? By realizing that she IS my greatest blessing and that she deserves the very best of my love. And then I remember that she is fighting a greater fight than I could ever hope to understand right now. I can see her trials but I can't live them like she has to.

And suddenly the job becomes easy and a joy.

May God bless you with His plans becoming your plans today.

Jack